You Shouldn't Mess With Her
by TheLittleBlueFangirl
Summary: Hiccup... well she sort of explodes at Snotlout. But that's expected; he's a bad cousin. The reason behind it? Her period. She's on her period and poor Ash has to learn to understand it. One-shot Genderbend Hiccstrid Fem!Hiccup Male!Astrid


**You Shouldn't Mess With Her**

 **Ash POV**

Hiccup was on edge.

She still smiled, she still kissed him sweetly on the nose when she saw him and still held his hand contently. But she was off. Sometimes she seemed to stop for a moment, breathing more controlled than it should have to be and put on a fake smile before going back to normal.

Bringing her closer, he whispered in her ear as they walked with the other riders, "What's wrong?"

"Nothing," Hiccup managed a smile, "I'm okay."

He nodded with a little frown.

The others were laughing at something, looking at them.

"What is it this time?" he sighed.

"Just wondering how we caught you guys making out the other day in the forge."

Ash's cheeks felt hotter. "Like we haven't caught you and random girls making out."

"What can I say? I'm a chick magnet," Snotlout said with a wink.

Hiccup coughed out, "In your dreams," with the tiniest of smiles.

Everyone laughed except for an unamused Snotlout who rolled his eyes at her. When the laughter died down he made the biggest mistake he could've.

"Like you've done much better."

"Excuse me?" her tone had this sharpness that made Ash's spine stiffen.

"You've kissed one guy ever and just because you have a nice bod and took down the Red Death think that you're awesome. And honestly, the only reason guys would pin for you is because you're the chief's daughter."

The riders were quiet as Hiccup stood there, taking the insults, head lowered.

 _"Snotlout."_

He shrugged. "Someone has to be honest."

When Ash looked over at his girlfriend her body was shaking and he stepped forward to comfort her. But before he touched her shoulder, her head snapped up and he saw the fury in them. She was about to explode. Before he could even say a word, she leapt forward towards her cousin and punched him in the jaw. The hit made a sickening crack and she held her fist, face still deadly.

"SHUT THE HEL UP!" she roared.

Half the village must've heard her, but she didn't seem to care. "I swear if you are ever hoping to have a girlfriend, you'll have to stop being such a troll! You've insulted me since before I was even an outcast, because you hated that I was going to be chief! How can you be that _cruel_?"

As his girlfriend ranted, Ash felt his chest get torn in two. He turned to look at the others all of them silent, only Ruffnut with a look of familiarity on her face.

"What's happening?"

She cringed. "Hiccup's on her period."

Ruffnut saw the confused look on his face and sighed muttering about boys being clueless. "Girls get periods when they can physically get pregnant and it's basically them bleeding out the blood layer that they get in their stomach every month. It sucks and it hurts for some people. Hiccup… well she's had the worst that anyone's had for ages… and along with the pain there's the mood swings…"

He frowned at the word 'pain'. "How bad is it?"

"She says it like getting stabbed in the stomach."

"Damn it."

She was still ranting and looked close to tears clutching at her stomach. He leapt forward and wrapped his arms around her, pressing gentle kisses into her hair.

"Come on let's get you some pain medicine," he whispered.

Hiccup nodded and curled her hands into his shirt. "C-can w-we get some of t-t-that sweet s-stuff that T-Trader Johann g-gave the b-baker?"

He smiled. "Of course we can, do you want me to carry you?"

Her head bobbed and he scooped her up in his arms in a bridal carry.

Managing a smile, he looked over to the others. "Get the arsehole's jaw iced and Fish?"

"Yes?"

"Try not to make Tuff barf again; he doesn't need to see you making out with his sister."

Fishleg's nodded sheepishly, Ruffnut smiling cheekily at him. He turned away from them and started carrying his girlfriend to the healer's hut, hearing Snotlout calling out in a pained voice, "I heard that!"

* * *

Eating a 'sweet' quite happily, Hiccup was content the pain having subsided from some medicine and was somewhat back to her normal cheeky, sarcastic self as they sat on some wooden crates outside of the baker's. Still grinning as she ate her food, he thought about what Ruff had said. Was it really that bad? This period thing?

"Hey Hiccup?" he asked carefully.

"Yes?" she was grinning widely, her slight buckteeth annoyingly adorable.

"Is this period thing always this bad?"

Hiccup's entire body stiffened and her face turned a bright shade of scarlet. She fiddled with her food in embarrassment.

"W-who told you about it?"

"Ruff; she said that you get really bad pain from it… is it always this bad?" he asked.

She blushed, but nodded. "Normally I remember to take my medicine, but I forgot today."

He leant forward and pulled her closer to him, pressing a gentle kiss to her cheek. Hiccup blushed like she always did, still not used to the affection in public even two months into their relationship.

"If I can ever do anything to help, tell me okay?"

She smiled, softly touching his cheek. "You being you helps a lot, but I'll ask if I need any extra help."

"So you won't ask?"

Laughing, she pushed him softly. "Yeah… offer me help, come to think about."

He grinned. "Sure thing."

She got comfortable in his arms, continuing to eat her 'sweet' until there wasn't any left leaving her with a little frown. He smiled when she looked at him with a cute little crease between her eyes. Gods he wanted to kiss that little crease away.

"It's all gone."

Ash kissed the little crease while she was too immersed with confusion to blush. "Yep."

"But it was so yummy!"

"We can get another one if you-" he felt around the pockets of his leather pants and found nothing. Not a single coin.

Ash swore, Hiccup laughing softly at him and kissing his cheek, patting his shoulder. "It's okay, I don't want any more."

"But I want some!" he whined and she giggled.

She looked thoughtful for a moment before grinning widely and pointing to the corner of her lip. "Hey do I have any food on my face right here?"

He frowned, looking closer, "No I don't think-"

Ash never got to finish what he was saying, being interrupted by Hiccup pressing her lips against his.

Sweet. She tasted so sweet that he tried not to sigh happily when her hands tangled into his hair and pulled him closer. Gently chapped lips that he loved to bits moved tenderly against his, one of his hands finding itself around her waist, the other cupping her cheek. Hiccup didn't normally initiate kisses; she'd give him a peck on the cheek, but every once in while that she was bold enough to kiss him. And they were always some of their best kisses (not that any of them were bad; they were far from that, but some were decidedly better than others). When she finally pulled away, they were both breathing heavily, still grinning.

"Where'd that come from?"

"You wanted to have a taste," she shrugged.

He laughed. "Cheeky as ever."

She grinned, grabbing his hand and swinging it around wildly. Carefree again, his lips tugged as Hiccup's attitude improved, a feeling of relief washing over him.

Then her eyes widened and Hiccup seemed to break down. Eyes teary, she looked devastated, Ash wrapping his arms around her.

"What's wrong?"

"I-I-I forgot t-to feed Tooth-less," Hiccup sobbed into his shoulder.

Ash found himself making the most confused face that he'd ever made over her shoulder. She was breaking down over forgetting to feed her dragon who could easily beg for food with his big puppy dog eyes or fish for food... _mood swings_. Damn it. He sighed softly, rubbing her back as she sobbed, reassuring her that he'd feed him for her. She nodded, mumbling a quiet sweet thank you into his ear.

Gods, this was going to be a long day. Stupid periods.

 **I hope you liked this! This was marine1324's idea, so thank you! Apologies that it's a bit rough, I wrote it in a day, so it's not perfect, but enjoy (BTW it's been edited since then)! And I hope you like Ash's innocence to the subject and his sweetness!**

 **-Blue**


End file.
